Today we are talking about how to tell if you’re in a good relationship and what signs to look for.
We all know relationships aren’t always easy. And, just like people, relationships can grow over time.
Trying to grasp anything that is ever-changing can feel like we’re just throwing spaghetti at a wall.
While relationships can be hard, a healthy relationship is definitely worth it.
Although having a good relationship may offer wonderful advantages, an unhealthy one might be worse than being alone.
So, how can you tell if your in a healthy relationship?
While their isn’t a totally foolproof way to score your relationship, healthy relationships have some common features.
Here are a few signs of what a good relationship should look like.
1. Harmony and Balance
A good relationship should feel like a harmonious balance.
You and your partner should feel like you are on the same team, with each other’s best interests at heart.
There should be mutual respect and an equal give-and-take in the relationship.
But what does that really mean?
It means that if one person is always giving while the other takes, or if one person is always taking while the other gives, then there is disharmony in the relationship.
This can eventually lead to resentment and unhappiness on both sides.
A healthy relationship requires balance.
Both partners need to feel like they are contributing equally and that their needs are being met.
When this happens, both people in the relationship will be much happier and more fulfilled.
And balance looks different in each relationship,
For instance, there may be a big imbalance in the financial aspects of a relationship, but other aspects of the relationship help to compensate for it.
One example may be that you are the primary bread winner.
But they are great at organizing your schedules, keeping up with household tasks and ensuring your lives generally run smoothly.
All though things aren’t “equal” they do balance out and help to create a harmonious relationship.
Each person brings their own skills and functions to the table.
- Generally is the relationship fair?
- Is each person giving the same overall effort and/or resources?
- Or is one person always getting the better end of the stick?
In general, you’ll each have your own strengths and weaknesses, but are each of you contributing to the relationship in a fair and balanced way.
Both partners should feel comfortable expressing their emotions and concerns openly to each other.
It’s not fun to be in a relationship where you feel like you have to hide your pain and concerns from your partner.
Do you feel like you can be open with your man?
Does he feel free to be open with you?
When two people can express themselves openly, they are able to resolve problems and understand one another better.
They can also grow together and encourage each other to be and do better in life, often helping each other reach goals and feel accomplished and satisfied.
Are you comfortable sharing any issue?
3. Common Life Goals
For a relationship to thrive over the long-haul, it’s important that there be a common objective.
That goal might include having 3 kids and a nice house in ‘burbs. Or, it maybe yall liked to retire at 40 and travel the world together.
Regardless, you should be on a similar path with similar goals.
If one person wants a kids and the other doesn’t, there’s a good chance your setting your relationship up for failure.
Do you both want the same things 10 or 20 years from now?
This a discussion that should take place to ensure you don’t have completely opposite life goals.
4. You Make Time to Have Fun
Couples who have fun together tend to stay together.
It’s just that simple.
When you are together, do you enjoy each other’s company or does time seem to drag?
Do you look forward to your next date or time spent together?
Do you like spending time together and sharing the same space?
Couples who make it a point to have fun together often find that their relationship is more fulfilling and lasts longer.
Think about it – when was the last time you did something purely for fun with your partner?
Life can get pretty darn busy and before you know it, months have gone by without any real quality time spent with the one you love.
Date nights are great, but try not to wait until the weekend to have some fun.
Plan some fun activities during the week as well.
It doesn’t have to be anything big or fancy, just something that you both enjoy and can look forward to.
In a healthy relationship both parties should be having fun on a regular basis.
5. Mutual Respect
All healthy relationships must have mutual respect.
- Do you feel valued and respected by your partner.
- Do you respect your partner as an individual, their thoughts and opinions even when they differ from yours?
Without respect, their is no room for growth and no room for love bloom.
Do you respect each other enough that both of you feel valued and important?
6. Can Settle Conflicts in a Healthy Way
All couples have disagreements and will experience conflict in their relationships.
However, it’s important that you are able to resolve those conflicts in a healthy way.
In fact, conflict can even make relationships stronger and help you understand each other on a deeper level.
Questions to ask yourself are:
- Do you find that you are able to communicate with your partner and work through problems?
- Do you feel like your partner is open to hearing your side of things and willing to compromise?
- How do problem solve in your relationship?
- Do these hard conversations strengthen your relationship or make it feel fragile?
- Do you get nervous bringing up issues with your partner?
- How do you feel after a dispute?
Conflict is bound to happen in any relationship, but how you handle it can make all the difference.
If you can settle your differences in a respectful way, it will help to strengthen the bond between you and create a more harmonious relationship.
Settling arguments fairly and with respect is a sign of a healthy relationship.
On the other hand, if you are constantly arguing and unable to see eye-to-eye on anything, it could be a sign that your relationship is in trouble.
In any relationship, it’s important to feel accepted for who you are – flaws and all.
- Do you feel like your partner accepts you for who you are?
- Do they love you despite your shortcomings?
- Do you like your partner for who they are and accept them without expecting them to change?
- Do they make an effort to understand and accept things that are important to you even if they don’t necessarily agree with them?
Some people enter into a relationship thinking they are going to change the other person to better suit their own preferences.
This simply doesn’t work. If you can’t accept your partner for who they are, it may be time to consider finding someone else.
Of course, no one is perfect. But this goes back to the balance aspect of a relationship.
Being able to accept flaws in your partner as they make up for it in other ways, and making sure they feel the same way about you.
Again, relationships are hard work.
Being in a good relationship is an active choice between both partners.
If one or both people aren’t completely committed to working hard in the relationship, it’s unlikely to survive.
Do both of you make the relationship a priority?
Most relationships can be successful if both people are commit to it enough.
Being in a healthy relationship can be one of the most satisfying feelings you can have.
Healthy relationships are the key to living a full, satisfying life.
Unhealthy relationships can make your entire life feel like it’s in disarray.
Make sure that the relationship you’re in is adding way more good than bad.